Saturday, March 13, 2010

GOOD-BYE AND HELLO

There are all kinds of bravery and much of it is never seen.

Today Wally refused to take his meds, food or water. He just wants to sleep for a thousand years. He told me he was tired of the pain, and he has never complained of pain before. When I told him I had left orders with the nursing team not to make him do anything he did not want to do, he squeezed my hand and said, "Thank-you."

A long time ago I promised him I would let him go when he told me the time had come. I have kept my promise, but I can't stop crying. I have kept these tears and this pain from him, but now I can't hold back. Tomorrow he may not know me at all. God is coming for him soon. Then I will rejoice that he is free ... at last. And home, in God's arms, where he belongs.

And he will join my sister-in-spirit, Ellie, at the Bonwallelle Bench, to wait for me.

21 comments:

  1. I pray that he will have a blessed passage and will see the beautiful light that opens to the new world God has planned for him.

    Then you will be called to your own new life here until it is time to meet him again.

    Cheryl

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's indeed a miracle I can't believe am finally free from herpes virus, am grateful to this powerful herbalist called Dr Perfect.
      I'm Chris Anderson from UK I was sick of herpes for 3 years it affected my relationship with my girlfriend when she find out I was having herpes she left me, I missed her so much because I loved her with all my heart and she always makes me happy she was the source of my happiness I wanted her to come back to me, so I took every treatment and drugs but none could cure my sickness I never lose hope because I believe I will surely get cured and be reunited with my girlfriend again so I went online to search for herpes cure and I came across a comment of a man on how this powerful herbalist cured him of herpes, I didn't hesitate I emailed him and explained my problem to him on how this herpes has affected my relationship he replied my mail and he asked for some information which I gave him and he prepared a herbal cure when he finished preparing the cure he sent it to me and instructed me on how to use it and I did it as I was instructed, five days later I couldn't find any sign of herpes that's was how I was free from herpes virus and he also did a love spell that brought back my ex girlfriend, this was the best thing that have ever happened to me am indeed grateful to Dr Perfect for the help he has rendered to me if you need help to cure your diseases or bring back your ex contact him and get your problems solved at solutiontoallproblems1@gmail.com
      You can also add him up on WhatsApp +1 (256)-251-3614

      He can also cure the following diseases
      1. Herpes virus
      2. Chronic venous disease
      3. Gonorrhoea
      4. Hiv/aids
      5. Alzheimers disease
      6. Asepsis
      7. Cancer
      8. Cerebrospinal meingtitis
      9. Infertility problems
      10. Als/ebv
      11. Hpv
      12. Enlargement of any type
      13. Getting back ex lover/divorce
      14. Hepatitis a,b,c
      15. Syphilis
      16. Arthritis
      17. Severe atopic dermatitis
      18. Leukaemia/lupus virus and many more....

      Delete
  2. Bonnie,

    I am so saddened to read this post. My heart is with you while you go through your goodbye's.

    Love,
    Tania

    ReplyDelete
  3. Bonnie;

    From a Canadian stranger who would gladly share your pain if I could, know that you are both in my prayers. May the Peace that is beyond anyone's understanding be yours.

    Bob

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am so sorry for what you and your husband are going through right now. I do not know you personally, but you will be in my prayers tonight.

    ReplyDelete
  5. NicoleFreeman/BC87March 14, 2010 at 1:38 AM

    How beautiful a love for one another you have shared, what courage it took for you to do that with the nursing staff so that your husband can have peace, I would like to believe that God creates a special place for your loyalty and love, and that he will indeed be waiting for you with hand outstretched when your own time ends, standing straight and tall and glowing with the light of God's love

    ReplyDelete
  6. I read about this blog on Patientslikeme & had to check it out. It brought tears to my eyes. As a PWP, I can only think how lucky your husband is to have you by his side through this. God Bless you & your husband. Donna

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's indeed a miracle I can't believe am finally free from herpes virus, am grateful to this powerful herbalist called Dr Perfect.
      I'm Chris Anderson from UK I was sick of herpes for 3 years it affected my relationship with my girlfriend when she find out I was having herpes she left me, I missed her so much because I loved her with all my heart and she always makes me happy she was the source of my happiness I wanted her to come back to me, so I took every treatment and drugs but none could cure my sickness I never lose hope because I believe I will surely get cured and be reunited with my girlfriend again so I went online to search for herpes cure and I came across a comment of a man on how this powerful herbalist cured him of herpes, I didn't hesitate I emailed him and explained my problem to him on how this herpes has affected my relationship he replied my mail and he asked for some information which I gave him and he prepared a herbal cure when he finished preparing the cure he sent it to me and instructed me on how to use it and I did it as I was instructed, five days later I couldn't find any sign of herpes that's was how I was free from herpes virus and he also did a love spell that brought back my ex girlfriend, this was the best thing that have ever happened to me am indeed grateful to Dr Perfect for the help he has rendered to me if you need help to cure your diseases or bring back your ex contact him and get your problems solved at solutiontoallproblems1@gmail.com
      You can also add him up on WhatsApp +1 (256)-251-3614

      He can also cure the following diseases
      1. Herpes virus
      2. Chronic venous disease
      3. Gonorrhoea
      4. Hiv/aids
      5. Alzheimers disease
      6. Asepsis
      7. Cancer
      8. Cerebrospinal meingtitis
      9. Infertility problems
      10. Als/ebv
      11. Hpv
      12. Enlargement of any type
      13. Getting back ex lover/divorce
      14. Hepatitis a,b,c
      15. Syphilis
      16. Arthritis
      17. Severe atopic dermatitis
      18. Leukaemia/lupus virus and many more....

      Delete
  7. We, too, have been caregivers for parents and seen that final time on more than one occasion. God bless you both as this time approaches. There's something very holy about being witness to a dear loved one's passing.

    I, too, came from PLM. There is a caregiver's place at PatientsLikeMe.com, if you would like support in the coming months.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I read about your blog on plm. Wishing that you receive the comfort that you deserve in having made the right decision. Your husband was lucky to have such a supportive caregiver and partner.
    I hope for him the peace he desires. Take care.
    Byrdogie

    ReplyDelete
  9. God bless you Bonny and fill you with His everlasting peace.
    It is only one sleep for your husband before he sees you again. You have much longer to wait. My heart is with you as Geoff is nearing the same time in his life.
    I will be prayng for you dear sister,
    Blessings, Wyn

    ReplyDelete
  10. Bonnie,

    Thru PLM I heard about you and Wally. Your story reminds me so very much of the years from my dad's dx to my dx (inherited) to me being one of his caretakers and his passing. I know the heartbreak and heart aches from watching some one you love deteriorate right in front of you and being helpless, other than to just be there for them. I would love to talk with you privately (some patients and caregivers just cannot handle what we know will probably be part of their future.) I am going to send the man who put this on PLM a messasge and ask him to pass along my email address, if you decide to communicate with me.

    In the meantime, please know there are a lot of people praying for you and Wally and sending you hugs. Also know that God is right there with you at every tear you shed.

    Sincerely,

    ReplyDelete
  11. I have been following your journey and I have been blessed to be a part of it through your heart. May the Lord bless you Bonnie and your dear husband while he slips into the arms of our Lord. EC

    ReplyDelete
  12. Forgive me, all of you, who have left such wonderful and inspiring messages. Your prayers bring tears to my eyes. This makes me even more sorry that I have not looked through my blog until today.

    The strange thing -- perhaps the miracle of prayer -- Wally rallied once the doctor agreed to remove the vacuum treatment to clean out the infected ulcer covering his lower back. The wound is even better after all these months. But, Wally is depressed. He doesn't understand why God hasn't taken him when he was ready to go, and I had let him go. "I don't know what more He expects of me."

    Now Wally feels trapped inside his body and resents it. He's angry at God and me because I sought treatment for his ulcer. "It would have been better if the blood poisoning killed me."

    Anonymous, and all who wish to communicate with me directly, my email address is bonnie.toews@rogers.com.

    To all, a big hug and thank you for reaching out and adding such loving support.

    Bonnie

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  14. It's indeed a miracle I can't believe am finally free from herpes virus, am grateful to this powerful herbalist called Dr Perfect.
    I'm Chris Anderson from UK I was sick of herpes for 3 years it affected my relationship with my girlfriend when she find out I was having herpes she left me, I missed her so much because I loved her with all my heart and she always makes me happy she was the source of my happiness I wanted her to come back to me, so I took every treatment and drugs but none could cure my sickness I never lose hope because I believe I will surely get cured and be reunited with my girlfriend again so I went online to search for herpes cure and I came across a comment of a man on how this powerful herbalist cured him of herpes, I didn't hesitate I emailed him and explained my problem to him on how this herpes has affected my relationship he replied my mail and he asked for some information which I gave him and he prepared a herbal cure when he finished preparing the cure he sent it to me and instructed me on how to use it and I did it as I was instructed, five days later I couldn't find any sign of herpes that's was how I was free from herpes virus and he also did a love spell that brought back my ex girlfriend, this was the best thing that have ever happened to me am indeed grateful to Dr Perfect for the help he has rendered to me if you need help to cure your diseases or bring back your ex contact him and get your problems solved at solutiontoallproblems1@gmail.com
    You can also add him up on WhatsApp +1 (256)-251-3614

    He can also cure the following diseases
    1. Herpes virus
    2. Chronic venous disease
    3. Gonorrhoea
    4. Hiv/aids
    5. Alzheimers disease
    6. Asepsis
    7. Cancer
    8. Cerebrospinal meingtitis
    9. Infertility problems
    10. Als/ebv
    11. Hpv
    12. Enlargement of any type
    13. Getting back ex lover/divorce
    14. Hepatitis a,b,c
    15. Syphilis
    16. Arthritis
    17. Severe atopic dermatitis
    18. Leukaemia/lupus virus and many more....

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete

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    ReplyDelete
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If you have questions you would like answered about caregiving a person with Parkinson's Disease in future posts, please add them to your comment. I have no medical knowledge and cannot discuss drug treatments.